Write, Read, and Remember

As I helped my daughter sort through her “special box”, I noticed there was a fancy journal she had started but decided not to continue because she had messed up a page and thought it was too ugly to keep.

I tried to convince her that diaries didn’t have to be neat.  In fact, sometimes the messy writing, scribbled diagrams, or tear stains are part of their charm.  She didn’t believe me, so I went to my cedar chest and dug out my box of old journals.  My children gathered around as I lifted these treasures out one by one.  I carefully opened the pages and showed them what my printing (starting at age 7), then cursive, looked like.  I pointed out mistakes and misspelled words.  They were enthralled and convinced that perfection is not the point of keeping a personal record.

What is the point of keeping a journal?  To remember special moments, learn from past mistakes, relate to youngsters, and resolve family disputes.  But most of all, to leave a record of your life so your children and grandchildren can know you.

When email came on the scene, I noticed my journal entries decreased.  Instead of spending a half hour on Sunday afternoons to write, I found myself typing emails to my family and friends instead.  But then I got smart and printed off these emails to put in a binder journal.

Then came Facebook.  I recently realized that precious information about who I am in 2012 while my children are young is being sent into cyber-wherever-ness instead of being preserved in something tangible.

So I bought a pretty spiral notebook and began to copy my status updates into it.  I add extra personal information as needed – et voila! – I’ve got another valuable record that I can read, remember, and share with future generations.

The Newest Bully

Bullies have always been around.  In fact, if we consider world history on a corrupt-kings-and-tyrannical-leadership scale, it used to be worse. Things got better for countries who embraced the concept of human rights, but even then bullies remained.

So why this recent focus frenzy on bullying?  Has it really gotten worse lately or do we just hear about it more?  The tragic teen suicides and school shootings have definitely put the issue into the spotlight.  But no, bullying is not new, though something else is:  computer technology and the Internet and, in turn, cyber-bullying.

At one time, children could come home and get away from the negative peer behaviour that was going on at school.  Now, the moment they turn on their computers, log in to social networking sites, or flip open their cell phones, it could be there waiting for them.

Cyber-bullying is especially dangerous because, a) it can be constant (can’t get away as mentioned above), b) it can be hard for adults to notice (unlike a black eye), c) it can be more malicious than face-to-face bullying because perpetrators have a sense of protective anonymity, and d) it can be hard to stop because perpetrators actually CAN be anonymous and almost impossible to catch.

I appreciate technology, I really do.  But if we’re not careful, it could make a lot of things worse, including bullying.  Are children and teens with their heads glued to iPads and thumbs stuck to iPhones learning proper socials skills, conflict resolution, and so forth?  Are parents who are likewise addicted to technology noticing what’s going on with their children?  Are they spending time teaching them to be sociable, kind, and accountable?

If we adults don’t control the technology in our lives by monitoring Internet usage, watching for cyber-bullies, and unplugging often to practice positive face-to-face communication, then who will?