Anticipation

This time last year I wrote an article called “The Top of the Hill”.  It was about me turning thirty-nine and dreading turning forty.

Well, this week I’ll reach that milestone, and you know what?  I’m fine with it.  No big deal.  I’m forty!!  I’ve earned my gray hairs, spider veins, and skin tags!

Before I turned thirty, I also panicked.  And I’ll probably freak out about turning fifty.  But I’m starting to see a pattern:  Sometimes the anticipation is worse than the actual event.

It works the other way too.  Sometimes the anticipation is better than the event – like the vacation you planned for a year then vomited the entire time.

When I was a teenager, the thought of moving away from home was frightening.  I couldn’t fathom ever being ready to live away from my family.  But I did it.  I lived on my own for six years before I got married.

My daughter worries about moving away from home.  I tell her not to worry – that when it’s time, she’ll be ready.  Funny how that works.  Anticipation can help us to prepare for and accept what’s coming.  A wise man once said, “If you are prepared, you shall not fear”.

Then there’s cleaning toilets, ironing, and dusting – three chores I detest.  When I anticipate them, I am miserable.  When I jump in, get it done, reward myself, and bask in the triumph of a job completed, I am happy.  Why do I waste time and energy dreading things?

I hope that as the years go on, I will wisely remember to savour each moment and each challenge, looking forward – with the joyous, motivating kind of anticipation, not the worrisome, anxious kind – to what the next day will bring.

Christmas Spirit

I started the season by writing a short story, The Christmas Condition, about a young woman whose first Christmas home after moving to the city isn’t quite what she expected.  Eventually, she learns that the condition of her heart is more important than the conditions around her.

With those sentiments in mind, I got off to a good start – thinking of others, feeling the joy, not stressing over things that don’t matter.

Somehow, despite my good intentions, the evil elf squeezed his way into our home and began to spread anti-Christmas tidings.  Don’t you hate it when the “bah humbuggers” ruin things for the rest of us?

A few nights ago I couldn’t take the negativity anymore.  I mean, when you get to bickering over which holiday movie to enjoy as a family, things aren’t going well.  So I went to my room and finished reading a favourite Christmas book.  Then I stared at the ceiling for awhile until I had an idea.  Not just an idea; inspiration: “The only person you can change is yourself.”

Words from my novelette’s main character echoed in my head:  “I realized that my Christmas cheer was conditional – based on events that were happening NOW instead of THE EVENT that happened two thousand years ago.”

Was it possible?  Was I allowing my Christmas cheer to ebb and flow based on the actions of those around me instead of what was in my own heart?

I said a quick prayer then asked, “Who wants a story?”  Three of my children gathered around to hear an inspiring Christmas tale.  As we snuggled, our hearts filled and spilled with love, patience, forgiveness, selflessness, and gratitude.  The Spirit of Christmas, which is the Spirit of Christ, was back.

To you and yours this holiday season, I wish you hearts full of peace, love, and joy.

The Magic of Giving

My first Christmas away from home was spent in Montreal with a roommate from Italy.  We couldn’t be with our families, so on Christmas Day we went to a long-term care facility to feed those who couldn’t feed themselves.  After lunch we went from room to room, visiting, admiring family photos, and singing requested carols.

One woman scared me.  When we went to her room, she hissed with bared teeth and foul breath, “I’m gonna die!”  Fortunately, a friend who was with us knew what to do.  He removed the angel from his lapel and gently pinned it to her nightgown, explaining that this angel would keep her company.  Her face softened and peace filled her eyes.  I marveled at the difference this kind but simple gesture had made to a frightened woman.

Not many days later we found her bed vacant, and I was extra grateful that we had spent some time and shared a little joy with her on Christmas Day.

Subsequent Christmases have come and gone, filled with friends and family, parties and concerts, good food, and plenty of presents.  Still, something about that Christmas in Montreal stands out from the others.  Gifts were few and family was absent, but joy was abundant as I learned that most important lesson:  When we give, we can’t help but receive.

That is the magic of giving.  When we spread love and joy by selflessly giving to others, we feel love and joy in our own hearts.

There are so many ways to give:  donating to a food bank; letting someone ahead of us in line; inviting a widow for dinner; shoveling a neighbour’s driveway; writing to a lonely uncle…  The possibilities are endless...and so is the magic of giving.

Deck The Halls Tutorial

This Friday marks an important moment in time:  One Month Until Christmas.

According to Facebook, some show-offs have already finished their Christmas shopping.  Others are calmly waiting until December 24^th to get started.  Most of us are probably somewhere in between, and our frantic list-making has begun.

But why stress about holiday prep when there’s a Christmas carol that tells us all we need to do?

Deck the halls with boughs of holly.  When the urge strikes, get out those decorations!  Enjoy the wreaths and candles and glittering lights sparkling against the tinsel on the tree.

‘Tis the season to be jolly.  Smile and spread the joy!  If your To Do lists are making you cranky, simplify them.

Don we now our gay apparel.  Wear it!  Now is the only time of year when we can get away with wearing those gaudy sweaters, Santa Claus ties, and earrings that look like tree baubles.

Troll the ancient Yuletide carol.  Sing!  Whether with a group of carolers, during a church service, or online with Bing Crosby and Elvis Presley, singing will fill our hearts with Christmas cheer.

The Fa-la-la-la-las I haven’t quite figured out.  I think they might be a reminder of holiday party behaviour for those who overindulge.  Beware!

So, now we’re decorated, dressed, smiling, and singing.  What more do we need?  Maybe some figgy pudding (other songs have good ideas too) and – oh yes – the most important advice of all:  taking time to tell of Yuletide treasure.  This means different things to different people.  For my family, it’s celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ.

Joy to the world - Christmas is on its way!